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  • Steve Dudley

Resistance in a Client is a Sign of a Lack of Rapport.

Rapport is a fundamental modality of life. By understanding we can make or break rapport with anyone in the world we understand that we can communicate with anyone if we are flexible enough.


A sign of lack of rapport means the communicators are not matching physically, auditorily or energetically.


A resistance in communication is most likely going to be on a physical level for example, not matching posture, gestures, expressions, blinking, breathing or proximity. Physical matching and mirroring accounts for about 55% of rapport.


You can also create resistance in rapport when you are being inflexible in your tonality (auditory). For example, if your pitch, speed, quality, and volume are not matching or in tune, then you will find miss-alignment and poor communication. Matching these auditory keys is about 38% of the communication.


Lastly, the words that you actually say. The words have less impact than you think, only 7% of rapport relies on the words you say. Still obviously important to match if you want to create rapport. With words you are trying to match representational modes – Meaning Visual, auditory, kinesthetic or auditory digital. Using the predicates or words from these rep modes will allow you to build rapport. As well as, matching key words, common experiences and content chunks.


Rapport is vital to all communication and if you want to build rapport start with the physical matching and mirroring elements. It will get you furthest quickest.

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  by Steven Dudley - "The only thing that's holding you back is you"

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